Relationships! This is a classic issue any where and any time. Often
times, people worry over the choice of partner they will pick and spend
the rest of their lives with.
Also, people who have already picked a partner do have times they ponder
on whether they made the right choice by marrying their spouse .
Here, our guest blogger digs in real nicely and you are sure to learn
loads from this single post. Dig in and take in some knowledge...
AM I WITH THE RIGHT PARTNER?
By Uwem Udoh
During a seminar, a woman asked," How do I know if I am with the
right person?"The author then noticed that there was a large man
sitting next to her so he said, "It depends. Is that your partner?" In
all seriousness, she answered "How do you know?" Let me answer this
question because the chances are good that it's weighing on your mind
replied the author.
Here's
the answer.Every relationship has a cycle… In the beginning; you fall
in love with your partner. You anticipate their calls, want their touch,
and like their idiosyncrasies.Falling in love wasn't hard. In fact, it
was a completely natural and spontaneous experience. You didn't have to
DO anything. That's why it's called "falling" in love.People in love
sometimes say, "I was swept of my feet."Picture the expression. It
implies that you were just standing there; doing nothing, and then
something happened TO YOU.Falling in love is a passive and spontaneous
experience. But after a few months or years of being together, the
euphoria of love fades. It's a natural cycle of EVERY relationship.
Slowly but surely, phone calls become a bother (if they come at all),
touch is not always welcome (when it happens), and your spouse's
idiosyncrasies,instead of being cute, drive you nuts. The symptoms of
this stage vary with every relationship; you will notice a dramatic
difference between the initial stage when you were in love and a much
duller or even angry subsequent stage.At this point, you and/or your
partner might start asking, "Am I with the right person?" And as you
reflect on the euphoria of the love you once had, you may begin to
desire that experience with someone else.
This is when relationships breakdown.The key to succeeding in a
relationship is not finding the right person; it's learning to love the
person you found.People blame their partners for their unhappiness and
look outside for fulfillment. Extramarital fulfillment comes in all
shapes and sizes.Infidelity is the most common. But sometimes people
turn to work, a hobby, friendship, excessive TV, or abusive substances.
But the answer to this dilemma does NOT lie outside your relationship.
It lies within it.I'm not saying that you couldn't fall in love with
someone else. You could. And TEMPORARILY you'd feel better. But you'd be
in the same situation a few years later.Because (listen carefully to
this):The key to succeeding in a Relationship is not finding the right
person; it's learning to love the Person you found.
SUSTAINING love is not a passive or spontaneous experience. You have to
work on it day in and day out. It takes time, effort, and energy. And
most importantly, it demands WISDOM. You have to know WHAT TO DO to make
it work. Make no mistake about it.Love is NOT a mystery. There are
specific things you can do (with or without your partner), Just as there
are physical laws Of the universe (such as gravity), there are also
laws for relationships. If you know how to apply these laws, the results
are predictable.Love is therefore a "decision". Not just a
feeling.Remember this always: God determines who walks into your life.
It is up to you to decide who you let walk away, who you let stay, and
who you refuse to let GO..
